Episode II - The Clone War

           “The Clone War” is a 2004 fan-edit of Episode II created by “Magnoliafan” (Who some believe to be Kevin Smith based on the use of the name Magnolifan in the film Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.) It is a sequel to “Balance of the Force” which was a re-edit of "The Phantom Menace". Magnoliafan has, once again, made some big changes to the basic plot of the prequels.

Among the most major changes is the nature of Count Dooku and the separatists. The opening crawl has been altered to use the word “rebellion” when referring to the separatists, implying that the separatists may be the beginning of the rebels that we see in Episodes IV – VI. Subtitles have been changed later in the filmand now characters actually refer to the separatists as the “Rebel Alliance”.

If this doesn’t make things morally ambiguous enough, Magnoliafan takes things one step further with Count Dooku’s character. In this film, Dooku is still the leader of the separatists, but not a Sith Lord.  Scenes in which he interacts with Sideous have been eliminated and he now fights with a yellow lightsaber instead of a red one. Viewers can really believe what he is saying he says Qui-Gon could be sympathetic to his cause. In fact, it is now entirely unclear if the Jedi are fighting on the right side in this galactic war.

Does Dooku's character work better if he is the "Father of the Rebellion" rather than a Sith Lord?

As with “Balance of the Force” annoying characters such as Jar Jar & the Nemodians no longer speak with racist accents, but in alien tongues. Again, deleted scenes have been re-edited into the film the majority of which include Padme’s parents, sister, and nieces. These scenes seem pointless until you realize that they have taken the place of some heavily mushy scenes involving Anaking & Padme rolling in meadows.

The Naberrie family enjoys a meal with Anakin & Padme

The entire film in general has been streamlined so that characters are less annoying. Anakin is a little more subtle in some places. Young Boba Fett no longer  has a stupid sinister laugh.  The librarian, Jocasta Nu has been eliminated entirely. Yet at the end of the film one might feel that Magnoliafan did not go far enough.

Another tongue-in-cheek dialogue change

The film still weighs heavily on a fan-boy’s heart. The plotline in which 3-P0’s head is switched with a battledroids is still present and only one of his needless puns have been altered. many love scenes with Anakin and Padme have been removed but the ones left over are still painful. No amount of editing could ever make their relationship believable. Anakin's immature whininess has been trimmed but enough of it remains so that the viewer can still be sure that Padme would never actually be into him.

Jar-Jar aside, was this not the worst part about the prequels?

In the end “The Clone War” is actually a brilliant edit of “Episode II”, but it seems that even a brilliant edit can’t save this film. Perhaps it was doomed the minute George Lucas set eyes on Hayden Christianson. Maybe that’s was the true love story behind Episode II. 

The Making of "Attack of the Clones"

“General Kenobi, Years ago, you served my father in the Clone Wars; now he begs you to help him in his struggle against the Empire.” ~Leia Organa

The Clone Wars were first mentioned in the original Star Wars, so when the prequels came out, fans expected to see them. It wasn’t immediately clear to every fan that the “Clone Wars”  involved actual clones, because we had never seen any characters in the original trilogy or "Phantom Menace" that were clones. There were stormtrooopers, but we never saw under their helmets and their voices were different. However, if you dive into abandoned Star Wars scripts, it is obvious that Lucas had always toyed with the idea of bringing cloning into the films.

Empire Strikes Back concept art

In the original draft of Empire Strikes back, for instance, Lando Calirissian is a clone. He can trace his clone heritage back five generations. Another interesting element in this draft are the native inhabitants of cloud city. They are described as tall, white-skinned creatures that ride on manta rays and use darts as weapons. These elements would later be recycled and used in “Attack of the Clones” as the basis for the inhabitants of Kamino.

In the end Lucas decided that the human template for the clones in his film would be Jango Fett (father of Boba Fett).The name of this character changes from draft to draft, sometimes it is J’mee and sometimes Ambu, but eventually Jango was the name Lucas chose. It is reminiscent of the 1966 Spaghetti Western “Django” (which was also the inspiration for Tarantino’s “Djano Unchained”)

Jango is played by New Zealander, Temuera Morrison. Because principal photography took place in 20^th Century Fox studios in Australia, basically any new character in the film is portrayed by Australian or New Zealand actors. This includes Jango Fett, Boba Fett, the Kaminoians, Zam Wessel, and the entire Lars family.

         

It's all Obi-Wan's fault! He's jealous! He's holding me back!

  One newcomer who doesn’t happen to be from Downunder is Hayden Christianson, who was cast to play Anakin Skywalker (age 19). Though over 1,500 other actors auditioned for the part (including Leo DiCaprio & Ryan Phillipe), Hayden was selected for his chemistry with actress Natalie Portman (apparently Lucas sees something the rest of us do not).

            Another actor added to the cast was film legend Christopher Lee. The character of Count Dooku seems to have been tailor-made for Lee, who became famous for his portrayal of Dracula in several films from the 50s through the 70s. Lee also holds the world record for the most swordfights in films, so it is fitting that his climactic scene in ‘Clones’ included a light saber duel with Jedi master Yoda. Although Lee was almost 80 at the time, he was able to do many of the scenes on his own, with a stunt actor hired for the more intensive work.

Yoda also had to perform his own stunts for the film and therefore could no longer be portrayed by a puppet. For the first time Yoda would be computer generated and the CG version looks much closer to the original trilogy puppet than it does to the botched Phantom Menace puppet.

Another Jedi who saw more action during this film is Mace Windu, played by Samuel L. Jackson. Since Windu would use a lightsaber in “Clones”, Jackson wanted his lightsaber to be different than the other Jedi. It was Jackson who requested that his saber be purple and Lucas agreed. There is also a rumor that Jackson had “B.A.M.F.” engraved into the hilt (if you don’t know what B.A.M.F. stands for, refer to the wallet scene in "Pulp Fiction").

Well, this is awkward...

In the end, “Attack of the Clones” serves as a much better Star Wars film than its prequel predecessor.  It is full of interesting characters, strange alien planets, bounty hunters, and light saber duels with actual dialogue between the actors. Sure, the romance between Anakin & Padme is uncomfortable and horribly written, but fans can look past that. If the film achieves nothing else, it gives Star Wars fans a glimpse of what the “Clone Wars” were and how they laid the seeds for the Evil Galactic Empire. Maybe that’s a romantic idea in and of itself.

Next Time on "Road to Episode VII":

We take a look at "Clone War"

Magnoliafan's fan-edit of Episode II!

The New Jedi Order

The first book of the NJO

In the fall of 1999, only months after the Phantom Menace released (largely criticized for being too kid-oriented) the Star Wars expanded universe launched a book series that would take Star Wars to darker places than it had ever been before. If the Star Wars prequels let fans down, then the New Jedi Order was the antidote for that disappointment.

The nineteen-book series ran from 1999 – 2003 and starts 21 years after Return of the Jedi. It was the furthest into the future any Star Wars project had yet explored. The story focuses on an invasion of the Star Wars galaxy by an alien race called the Yuuzhan Vong. 

The Yuuzhan Vong are not from the galaxy and cannot be sensed through The Force. The Vong are ultra-religious and shun any form of technology that is not organic. They embrace pain and even scar and disfigure themselves to add to their social status.

Among the weapons used by the Vong are amphistaffs, living snake-like staffs that can be used as a spear or a whip. They wear crab-like armor that blasters and lightsabers fail to penetrate. Even their space-fairing vessels are made of living coral.

Vong with Amphistaffs

 It doesn’t take the Yuuzhan Vong long to start occupying and destroying the planets of the galaxy and the New Rupublic and New Jedi Order struggle to defend themselves from the new threat.

Jaina, Luke, & Jacen surrounded

Among the major defenders of the galaxy are the Solo children; The elder twins, Jaina & Jacen, who both flirt with the dark side in these novels and the youngest son, Anakin, named after his grandfather.

         The New Jedi Order was criticized, by some, for being too dark. Without giving too much more away, some bad shit goes down for a lot of characters. The New Jedi order was the first piece of the EU to start killing off main characters and they start off in a big way. 

Even if you have not read the New Jedi Order books, you probably know that they kill Chewbacca off in the first act. Though this is a huge spoiler for the first book, I don’t consider it to be a huge spoiler because it’s been 15 years and if you haven’t read the books by now, maybe that fact will draw you in to reading them.

It will be interesting to see how the writers of Episode VII handle the expanded universe, especially this fact. Do you ignore that Chewie dies and just bring him back to life? Do you just reference his death and expect film fans to go back and read these 19 books (plus the other 300 books in the EU) to catch up?

Regardless of its effects on the Star Wars universe, The New Jedi Order achieves at least three things that the prequels do not.

1. Advancing the Star Wars universe into new, unpredictable territory

2. Giving the fans a dark narrative with adult themes

3. Bringing out a new, deadly enemy with enough depth to be feared and intriguing at the same time.

Luke & Mara

The New Jedi Order books are written by some of the top Science Fiction & Fantasy writers out there including R.A. Salvatore, Michael Stackpole, James Luceno, & Aaron Allston. So if you haven’t read them yet, don’t waste any more time.

Episode I: Balance of the Force

  “As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror”. This is how the release of “The Phantom Menace” felt to most Star Wars fans. There is too much wrong with Episode I to cover in this blog, and chances are you’ve seen the film so many times you know what is wrong with it. This blog is more about how people tried to fix “The Phantom Menace”. Though none of us has a time machine, there are a few brave souls who have tried to rewrite history. That’s right, I’m talking about fan editors.

            Many of you may have heard of “The Phantom Edit”, a film that removed half-an-hour of Jar Jar and Anakin from Episode I. The result makes for a quicker-paced film that is less childish. Yet there are other fan edits of Episode I out there and today I want to talk about one that has recently come to my attention. A true experience that all Star Wars fans should have. Something that very few people know about. It is called “Star Wars Episode I: Balance of the Force”

     “Balance of the Force” is one of a few fan edits created by someone named Magnoliafan (who various people think is Kevin Smith for a couple of different reasons). Magnoliafan offers viewers a completely new viewing experience for Star Wars fans and his work is nothing short of genius. He has not only eliminated some of the most annoying scenes from the film, he has completely reimagined the characters of the film and the plot in general.

 The first and most important thing to realize in “Balance of the Force” is that the Gungans and the Neimoidians no longer speak Basic (English).  This fact achieves at least three things. One: Neither species is an annoying stereotype of Asians or Blacks. Two: The new languages they speak sound kind of cool. Three: You can put whatever you want to in the subtitles.

New dialogue makes Episode I more interesting, less rigid

            It is interesting that Magnoliafan chooses not to cut Jar Jar’s role in this film (in fact he actually edits Jar Jar into a scene where he hadn’t been before). Instead Magnoliafan chooses to change Jar Jar’s personality. He is still a little clumsy, but now he is also kind of a dick. He swears. He calls people bastard. Jar Jar doesn’t give a shit anymore! He’s like honey badger.

Jar Jar is more adult and more tolerable

            Furthermore the film is no longer about a trade dispute. The Neimoidians are now trying to enslave the Naboo. The Gungans are angry at humans because the Naboo have stolen their Kyber Crystal and Boss Nass is actually a little scary. Sidious is also a little darker. His face is more hidden beneath his hood, which makes his identity more subtle. There have been slight alterations to his lines to make them a little more sadistic, darker. Just a few corny phrases removed.

Star Wars is bad ass again!

Sideous' face is more hidden. It is less obvious he is Palpatine.

            A few pointless scenes here and there have been deleted entirely (Like the second pair of monster fish in the core), but in their place Magnoliafan has inserted deleted scenes, such as the bongo falling over the waterfall and Anakin’s fight with Greedo. There are no midichlorians or virgin births in this edition but there is a nice scene where Watto is humming the Star Wars cantina music to himself in his shop.

Sebulba uses his flamethrower (This scene was not in Phantom Menace)

            Magnoliafan takes a lot of time carefully creating a vastly superior film, and no where is that more apparent than in the podrace scene.  All the annoying parts of the podrace are gone (Jabba, the announcers, silly alien noises) and in its place is a more exciting race. There is a lot of new footage here. Sebulba has more tricks up his sleeves and there are way more explosions. Anakin’s dialogue is trimmed down and he seems darker, more focused. Tusken Raiders are now firing at Jawas who are trying to salvage crashed pods. New music cues make the race seem more epic, something closer to the feel of the original trilogy.

And in the end isn't that what all of us wanted? A movie that had the same feel as the original trilogy? Fan edits bring us what Lucas failed to bring us: The Star Wars we used to know. 

Nass and the "Kyber Crystal"

            When “Balance of the Force” ends, you realize you didn’t hate the film. There is still boring dialogue and senate debates, but there is nothing that offends, no pointless childish humor. And the Gungans get back their Kyber Crystal.

            I recommend that you all immediately find a torrent and download this film. In fact, I am considering showing the film to my future children instead of Phantom Menace.  Magnoliafan, whoever he is, shows us that we don’t need a time machine to erase “The Phantom Menace” from history. We just need some editing skills and a whole lot of time.